“Mard ko dard nahi hota” — but men feel pain too. And sometimes, the pain nobody sees is the pain that needs our attention the most.
Men grow up believing that being a man means being strong at all times. They are expected to earn, provide, protect their families, care for their parents and fulfil countless responsibilities—often without expressing fear, exhaustion or vulnerability.
But who looks after the man who is expected to look after everyone else?
Behind the phrase “Sab theek hai” may be a man battling financial stress, loneliness, a failing marriage, workplace pressure, family responsibilities or a silent struggle with depression.
And there is another difficult conversation we need to have: men’s mental health in the context of marital disputes, alleged false accusations and prolonged legal battles
The numbers we cannot afford to ignore
According to India’s National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB), for the year 2023:
- 1,71,418 (1.71 lakh) people died by suicide.
- Men accounted for 72.8% of these deaths
- That is approximately 1.25 lakh men, or around 342 men every day.
Let that sink in.
Behind these numbers are sons, fathers, husbands, brothers, colleagues and friends. Men who may have been battling financial insecurity, family conflict, loneliness, relationship breakdowns, social expectations or mental health struggles that remained unseen.
These statistics do not tell us the full story of why each man died. They do, however, remind us that men’s suicide prevention deserves urgent attention.
We cannot keep telling men to carry the weight of the world and then remain silent when that weight becomes unbearable.
⚖️ When legal battles become a mental health crisis
For some, marital disputes and prolonged legal battles may add another layer of distress, and no man’s distress should be dismissed simply because he is expected to be strong or to simply put – because he is a man.
It is said that laws like domestic violence, dowry harassment and cruelty are made to protect women. However, these are so lopsided and we tend to look at it from the women’s perspectives so much that we completely miss aspect of how merely the presence of these laws is abused to such an extent that it causes innocent men to suffer unjustified harassment. Matrimonial disputes bring devastating combination of social stigma, financial pressure, separation from their children, damage to their reputation and years of legal uncertainty. Frivolous allegations and unncessary litigations make the process of coming out of these cleanly, itself as a ‘punishment’. These, added on the patriachal burdens expected from a man by deafult, usually become something that many men cannot endure, and end up ending themsleves.
Consider these documented examples:
- Atul Subhash, Bengaluru (2024): The software engineer died by suicide after leaving a detailed note and video alleging harassment connected with matrimonial litigation and the family-court system. His death sparked a nationwide discussion about men’s mental health and legal safeguards.
- Brijesh Singh, Rajasthan: In a case recorded in Munshiram v. State of Rajasthan (2018), suicide notes attributed to Brijesh Singh alleged that he and his family had been harassed through purportedly false dowry and domestic-violence cases.
- A 2022 suicide case considered by the Allahabad High Court in 2026: The deceased man’s father alleged that his son had been driven to suicide by harassment and false matrimonial cases. The High Court stressed that merely filing cases—even cases alleged to be false—does not by itself establish abetment of suicide. This illustrates that the Indian courts are still not open to the acceptance of that frivolousness or false cases by a man’s in-laws can be such a cause of concern for a man that it can drive him to suicide.
Countless of such men have ended their life. These accounts highlight the human cost of severe distress and the importance of taking men’s complaints seriously. Allegations in a suicide notes need to be taken more seriously to be thoroughly investigated and with a much better scritiny from police & courts. A much bettter support is expected from the Indian judicial system.
In the wake of supporting the vulnerable, Justice must abandon those who may be wrongly accused. A fair system should investigate evidence impartially, discourage malicious complaints where established, and ensure that no person’s dignity or mental well-being is treated as collateral damage in a legal dispute.
💙 So What Needs to Change?
- Raise boys to understand that expressing emotions is not weakness.
- Create safe spaces where men can discuss relationship problems, anxiety, depression and financial stress without ridicule.
- Encourage timely mental health support for men facing separation, custody disputes or prolonged litigation.
- Promote fair investigations, due process and accountability for proven malicious allegations.
- Train families, workplaces and communities to recognise signs of distress rather than dismissing them with “man up” or “be strong.”
- Make counselling and psychological support more accessible, including during difficult legal proceedings.
To every man who is struggling, we would like to say
- You are not merely your salary, your responsibilities, your marital status or your ability to endure pain. Your life has value beyond all of these things.
- You do not have to prove your innocence to the world, carry every burden alone, or hide your emotions to deserve compassion.
- If you are facing marital tensions, frivolous litigations or anticipating them, do reach out to NGOs under the aegis of “Save Indian Family“, created by men to support men or their families in distress, providing free counselling in all related matters. Under this banner of Save Indian Family, men in distress have opened NGOs at different locations in India. You can alternately call the National Helpine For Men, the one and only one such in India, called as SIF-One to reach out to a counselor around your place.
This also an appeal to the rest of us, or the society, to change the way we talk to men. Let us not measure a man’s success by how much he earns or how is he benefial to others. Instead of asking a man how much he earns or what’s his worth or reminding him of what will people say ask him: “Are you really okay? Do you feel heard? How can I help?”
This World Mental Health Day, let’s challenge the stigma surrounding men’s mental health, demand fairness in our institutions and build an India where every person—man or woman—can seek justice, speak openly and receive support without fear or shame.
Because masculinity should never mean suffering in silence. And no legal dispute, social expectation or personal crisis should make a man’s pain invisible.
Let’s listen. Let’s support. Let’s act before silence becomes tragedy. 💙
#WorldMentalHealthDay #MensMentalHealth #MentalHealthMatters #JusticeAndFairness #BreakTheStigma #MentalHealthIndia #LetsTalk
