Porn Stars as role models for women & false allegations

  • January 30, 2016
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I was in a deep slumber, may be in sixth hour of my sleep after staying up until 2 am. Some dream was playing on with cheering & singing when suddenly the phone rang.

I was shaken out of my sleep and managed to take the call. It was a victim call, a commercial pilot in a reputed airline. He was highly emotional, to the brink of crying. When he introduced himself to me, my mind had began readying itself to give out the standard regular response of listening patiently and then asking the guy to come to the meetings, giving out the details. I was subconsciously taking precautions to maintain a state of mind to return to sleep once the call could be done with. But what the pilot said next, jolted me out of my sleep.

Police is here, he said and it is my sister who has called the cops. She has assaulted herself, inflicted wounds on herself, broke my father’s cellphone and called the cops. The protective father, mindful of family izzat, interrupted from behind asking him to let it go, not tell details to me, the son shouted back ‘Papa I’ve to take steps for OUR PROTECTION!’ After POCSO & juvenile justice law being amended, the first question that came to my mind was, what are the ages of his sister and this guy. He continued, my sister also works in airline as ground staff, she is involved in some illegal activities, when we tried to stop, she assaulted herself and is saying will put us behind bars. Talking to victims, the counsellors generally get to see the darkest side of human relationships & behaviour, but maybe because of having an impression of beautiful and supportive nature of brother-sister, father-daughter relationships, this was a shock to bring me to a wide awake state although such allegations are not unheard in news reports.

I fumbled while talking to him, every time saying ‘your wife’ instead of ‘your sister’ while explaining him next steps available, because maybe even my fully awake conscious mind wasn’t prepared to deal with false cases of sexual and physical assault from a daughter or a sister against her father & brother. Disgusting allegations of THAT nature when she herself, being in her false mode of independent woman, was involved in some shady activities.

The call ended, but being an old school thinker, I continued a recent thought thread in my mind.
‘नैतिकता …
नष्ट हुई,
मानवता …
भ्रष्ट हुई
निर्लज्ज भाव से बहती हो क्यूँ?
विस्तार है अपार,
प्रजा दोनों पार
करे हाहाकार …
निःशब्द सदा
ओ गंगा तुम
ओ गंगा बहती हो क्यूँ?’
This song by Bhupen Hazarika replayed in my mind.

Certainly, the society, introduced to technology, prosperity and liberty has somehow chosen wrong role models for the youngsters. Within one generation immorality has leapt into pushing itself to acceptability and is creating its own problems. All through ancient history, in our nation there would have been famous gangsters & courtesans, who would have caught attention of the society but standards of morality would have held them out of the spotlight of glorification. In today’s age, trying to redefine freedom, our generation is mistaking boldness – of an ex-pornstar to leave her former profession and enter mainstream – by considering her success in films as an acceptability towards the shady profession of pornography. The highly educated and earning sister in the above case would have mentally crossed the threshold of considering pornography as immoral, thereby finding sleeping or being filmed while having intercourse with strangers as normal or maybe even with a false sense of liberation. The peer pressures of consumerist society might only have given legitimacy and fuelled the process of redefining yesterday’s immorality as today’s norm.

While making pornstars as our role models and glorifying what was hitherto immoral, the women of our younger generation might have initiated themselves into an existential abyss that justifies filing false cases against their family. But my thoughts remain with the hapless fathers, brothers, husbands and father-in-laws who haven’t participated in this journey and are facing horrifying false allegations in a legal environment that is designed to NOT protect them, just so that some women feel a false sense of empowerment. For their own sake, the father/brother must stop being protectors for the woman in the above example and she should be left to deal with results of her independent choices. The question that still remains unanswered is, what happens to her false allegations. Who will support such well meaning men disregarded by our society as nothing but criminals?

I can’t help but wonder what will it take to bring a change to support such men.
इतिहास की पुकार,
करे हुंकार…
ओ गंगा की धार
निर्बल जन को
सबल-संग्रामी, समग्रोगामी
बनाती नहीं हो क्यूँ?

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